Friday, January 11, 2008

From NFTD Archives...


...all the metric tons of bombs over Belgrade did nothing to sway Slobodan Milosevic's zeal until NATO put one right down his fucking chimney, at his home, blew up his goddamned house it did and the next day Slobo, the Butcher of The Balkans, decided he wanted a universal presence, as in UN forces, to come and monitor the situation and hopefully this would end the shattering of Yugoslavian cities, but my feeling is tons and tons and tons of ordnance, with countless bodies littering the countryside swayed Slobo not a whit till NATO pinpointed one right down on his own plush house in suburban Belgrade, and you can bet NATO knew what it was doing and knew that he wasn't home; 'Here,' the bombers said, 'try this on,' and BLOTTO, Slobo's homeless!

Hey, I'm not a big fan of bombing ANYthing. Even though he - Milosevic -deserves it, do all the people of Serbia? Why doesn't someone slip Madeline Albright a heater (if she doesn't have one she can run across the street to the park nearby The White House and I'm sure someone there will sell her one, if they don't blow HER away); anyway, then she can off the bastard across the diplomatic table. Who's gonna care? About time she earned her keep.

Anyway, that's NFTD's skewed view of things.


...when you look around and see what's going on.

Bombs over Baghdad? Belgrade? Kids wantonly slaughtering other kids...what gives? What's the buzz, tell me, what's a-happening? One cannot be current and aware of one's surroundings without being devastated by the can it be that I am living this cushy existence in East Eden, nestled in the forests of the Great Granite State, full larder, lots of toys, many perks, and yet, across the sea exploding missiles are hamburgerizing scores of essentially innocent people. Soldiers aren't dying; townspeople are dying.

Don't even have to go across the sea, just look here at home, go to
Littleton, to LA, Peoria or Ashtabula - there's trouble in River City. If you were going to troubleshoot the problems of the world as they exist today you have to go back several centuries, even further, and now these long-standing blood feuds continue unabated, generation after generation and generally one warped version or another of religious differences not uncommonly ending in avenging angels hacking one another to pieces. Algiers, Rwanda...the list of offenders is long, no country is free of this taint.

We're a senseless lot in the main; shoot first, ask questions later is
worldwide practice. Keep your head down, dig your bunker deeper, you're not being paranoid: the rest of the world IS after you.


...all this madness the world over. Here I am trying to make a living by being something of a (in my humble estimation) wry humorist with my hand on the pulse of the world, but what is one to do when all hell is exploding?

What is there to joke about?

It's all too sad and I am at Wit's End.

To whom appeal? Where is this elusive messianic devil we've been hearing about since time immemorial? This savior...

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